Monday, March 15, 2010

zipping on the other side of the coat: it's codswallop, you bodgey arsehole!


I have the normal amount of jackets - a solid starting rotation and then some alternates that I bring out once in awhile when I'm knackered and the weather is really piss. One of these coats comes from an England-based company, but I bought the jacket through a domestic purveyor so as not to directly contribute to our current account deficit. Here's the thing: out of all the jackets that I have ever been inside of (the first being when my friends and I made a pact to do so before graduation), this British piece is the only one that has ever had the zipper flipped to the left side. And it's not from the women's rack, I checked. The first time wearing it, I was in the bizarro world: up was down, down was up; I started saying hello when I left, and goodbye when I arrived. It was truly backwards, and wild. And so I gotta ask, is this zipper-switch a coincidence? Or is it something more sinister..

It's kind of logical isn't it? There are many precedents involved: among other things, those Tories and Whigs drive on the other side of the road, their bicyclists call out "on your right!" when passing the live(less)strongs, and their right-handed men will do anything to be the driver on the way home from the date so that they can make the lean over make-out move with their dominant hand. Every spacial action they take is straight out of the bizarro world, and thus we should not be surprised that they zip on the other side of the coat as well. I guess I just never thought it would come this.

To celebrate solving this whole zipper thing though, I say we call up some friends, GTL, and go get rat arsed.

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